Module Five: Spontaneity for Couples

To be spontaneous is to be available to your inner impulses or inclinations. It’s to be free-styling without a plan, and engaging without rehearsal or premeditation. Spontaneity is only possible if you are truly present to the moment revealing its opportunities.

There’s a beauty to advance choreographies, and pre-conceived ceremony or ritual, and spontaneity is complementary isn’t counter to having a vision of what you want. Even within structure, there’s space for improvisation and when you include spontaneity as a value, your fun can really expand.

Humans love novelty. As much as we love the familiar and protect our old habits, we also love a new way to say something or hear something. Within boundaries in which we feel safe, we love being surprised. Being spontaneous without your partner is not about pushing them drastically outside their comfort zone without notice, but it can be about teasing their edges.

Spontaneity and surrender go hand in hand. If you both allow spontaneity to guide the moment, then you’re both in surrender together. In intimacy and sex, this is a great combination. To be present and responsive to what’s arising is a wonderful way to be in bed. Leaning into spontaneity means you can discover what you want to do as you go. One glittery, desire-filled breadcrumbs can lead to the next.

1. Breathwork: Pussy and Cock Breathing

Lie on your back, with an open mouth and wide, relaxed jaw. Breathe in and out, making your breathing a “connected breath” which means that after you inhale, do not pause, continue with your exhalation, and again inhale without a pause. Follow your awareness and breath in all the way to your pussy or your cock. Your body may start to move in organic ways, which including pelvic rocking, bouncing, or shaking. Keep breathing and welcoming everything you feel.

2. Embodiment: Sensual Feeding

For this practice you need to prepare a plate with some chopped up fruit or chocolate or avocado. You want to use sensual foods that your partner will enjoy, cut into small pieces.

Make it simple or a banquet.

Blindfold your partner. Feed them in a sensual and whimsical way, with your spontaneity.

3. Intention Setting

For example:

I welcome the energy of spontaneity to surprise me.

My spontaneity gives me freedom to have fun anywhere anytime.

I’m spontaneously sensual with myself and my lover.

Integration: How was this for you?

2020 © Jena la Flamme -  All Rights Reserved